The Culture

(source: flickr.com via @_dchris)

Four months in and I’m getting the hang of the place. By hang, I mean I understand how things sort of work. And by work, I mean that each department does things differently because there are just no rules about what can and can’t be done. It’s the Wild West.

Since the money is still rolling in, this shoot first and ask questions later seems to be tolerated. Never mind that the company has culled a large proportion of its workforce in the last year. Never mind that there is little sense of team and that lunch hours are usually solo eating ventures. The place is still commercially viable despite its foibles.

I begin to think that this is the culture. Everything is down to the individual. Want to get things done? Do it your way. Just make sure that the margins are positive. There is no trust here. Everyone is in it for themselves and just be thankful that the boat isn’t sinking.

Then I read this about a letter sent by the CEO of Airbnb about keeping a company’s culture alive to sustain its future. If the company I work for is still making some money despite its appalling culture, is that such a bad thing?

Maybe I’m just in the wrong place, the wrong time but I have little faith here. Just like everyone else, I’m in it for me. I don’t trust in anyone doing the right thing and I’m just waiting for the right time to jump ship.


No Sympathy for the Wicked

(Source: flickr.com via @MelinaSouza

Disdain for an employer seems to be the common theme for much of this blog. When I think back to why I seem to build a hatred for a working environment, I can usually pin it down to individuals who are difficult to work with and for.

I always remember my first ever supervisor and when I tried to spruce up a presentation, he said that, “We don’t do that kind of thing here. If you want to be creative, go to Design.” That was quite an awful thing to hear in your first real job after trying to show some initiative.

Soon after that, I had a temperamental manager who was a genius and therefore measured your work against his considerable intellect. Naturally, a person could never measure up and I can remember oozing out of his office a number of times after his eruptive review of my output.

Now in this current environment, the pattern repeats. There is a senior consultant whose behavior is frustratingly erratic. At one point, she would eviscerate you for not doing a particular task in front of stakeholders and then be peachy sweet at the end of that meeting.

Her inconsistency in behavior is whispered about among those within the pod and we seek sympathy from each other whenever we got our humps busted. She is a constant reminder of who I don’t want to be.

I don’t know why humans mutate once they’re gathered in a commercial environment. This work-face makes them lesser human beings and the sooner the separation between that and home-face dissolves, the better working life is going to be.


Thinking About the Future

(Source: flickr.com via @Randall)

What this awful job has made me realize is that I’ve meandered for too long. While there have been creaking door openings for some ideal corporations, either I wasn’t quite the right person for them or that I just didn’t press my case as well as I could.

So, I’m annoyed that I can’t quite realize something that I’ve always wanted to do. A future where I’m just another guy with unfulfilled dreams looms large. That pains me because I’ve always felt that I could do something meaningful. Now, it’s looking more likely that I’ll just be ordinary. While that isn’t such a bad thing, wouldn’t it be nicer to make a big change, be a bit of a difference somehow?

Of course, time moves and sitting still won’t change things.